Women Have Such Silly Goals

... and one of mine is to lose some weight.
I have failed at this for my entire life, so I decided I needed to find another way. That's when, after much research, I decided to join Weight Watchers. You see, dear reader, I am a vegetarian, and all of these fancy food mailing diets would leave me less than satisfied for more reasons than one. So I decided that the WW point value system was the one for me. So a friend and I suited up, and headed to a WW meeting at the local grocery store... being the Loblawes super centre near my apartment...

I have to tell you, I understand the concept of a support system, however I definitely don't want 30 people holding my hand while I step on a scale.
So within minutes I was sitting in a room of chunky business men, house wives, career women, and grandmothers, all of whom know exactly how many lbs are in my spare tire. It started off well, we applauded some people who had met some goals, and some people shared their stories of trials, tribulations and successes. It felt like AlcAnon. There was a meeting leader at the front, and we all sat around in a circle and shared our stories. Then those who had reached milestones received symbolic stickers, badges and medals which were oddly similar to AlcAnon milestone badges. So then we moved onto the "meeting topic" where the meeting leader shares something with us that is supposed to inspire us all the way to rapid weight loss. I was all smiles until she went on to say "... so you should be there for each other. When you see each other out and about, don't just whisper to your friends how you know that person, say 'Hello, I recognize you from my WW group!'"

Suddenly my palms became so sweaty that I dropped my handy points calculator. WHISPER? HELLO? ISN'T THERE SOME KIND OF A CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT?! What the hell kind of support group shares your diet secrets with people they know? I am now frantic. Luckily there are very few young people in the room, and thus the odds of them whispering to a hottie at the bar that I am involved in a weight loss support group are slim.